Today, I want to share something a bit more personal: a story of limitation, acceptance, and healing.
Earlier this year, I experienced a shock of physical limitation. In December, I had a reaction to a minor procedure that left my body highly sensitive. Following that, I was almost entirely bed-bound for months. It was humbling, to say the least. I felt numb, weak, and like all my progress had halted. Just before that, I was in peak physical performance. My strength was building, my practice was deepening, and my teaching was energized. Then suddenly, stillness.
To be honest, I was heartbroken. So much of my joy was connected to my physical practice, and in its absence, there was a real sense of loss.
However, the somatic way is not to bypass what we feel, but to meet it. To allow experiences to arise, and meet them with kindness. I embraced the heartbreak, the attachment, the grief. At the same time, I stayed close to a quieter knowing beneath it all: the part that understands that everything moves, everything changes. This too will pass.
You can be with your experience in a way that is both honest and kind. You can acknowledge what is real, while also holding yourself with care. At some point, I had a recognition I’ve written about before: every obstacle is also a redirection.
My former practices no longer met me where I was. Core holds, inversions, even downward dog were simply too much for my system. So instead of trying to return to what was, I began to listen for what was possible now.
After trying and failing to return to my normal practices, I saw the old way wasn’t working. I tried going to yoga classes, but was met with physical tension and pain. I tried swimming, rock climbing, the elliptical, and other practices, but each time, my body responded with pain. It was telling me: this is too much, too fast.
So I recalled the experiences I’ve had of a true flow state, consciousness conducting a play in my body, and it came to me: it’s time to dance.
I found a quiet, semi-isolated place on a beach near me. I put in my headphones, and I danced. I have a background in dance, and interestingly, that became something I also needed to soften. I let go of form, alignment, and how anything looked. I stopped performing, even for myself. I turned inward and asked my body a simple question. What is nurturing for you now?
In the beginning, my attention had been on limitation. On what was not available. Now, instead of leading from expectation or memory, I let the body lead. The movements were small and subtle. Gentle rotations of my shoulders, soft openings through my chest, slow steps that moved energy through my body in a way that felt natural and cleansing. Nothing dramatic, nothing impressive. Just honest movement.
This emerged in a flow of sensation. All concern of the outside world disappeared. Flowing arm circles brought opening and joy to my system. Gentle heart-centered movements brought love and warmth through my body. My belly relaxed, my root softened. My feet touched the ground in just the exact way they wanted to, as my mind took the backseat and let my body drive us towards the path of healing.
After a week of practicing this way, I began to feel something change. My body started to rebalance. It began to show me how it wanted to move, how it wanted to heal. And then I realized, this is the gift.
My body needed to pause, for months, and that is okay. In that pause, something deeper reorganized. Now, it is teaching me how to move from listening to what is calling truly and deeply in the present moment, not the echoes of the past or expectations of the future. This is the commitment I carry forward.
To my body, my temple, my vehicle through this life, I honor you. I respect you. I love you. I will listen to you and give you what you need to thrive.
There is no rush to get back to where I was. ‘Getting back’ is the goal when the mind is in charge. What matters now is going deeper. Deepening the relationship. Deepening the trust. Deepening the ability to listen.
If you are moving through your own season of limitation or change, I invite you to try something simple.
Take a moment and ask your body: what is nurturing for you now?
Then, listen to the path forward. Sometimes healing does not come from doing more. Sometimes it comes from finally listening. And now, I cherish returning to my practice in a new way, a deeper way of inner guidance. 🌿